A Buddhist Perspective: How to Stay Kind When Others Aren't

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How to Stay Kind When Others Aren’t

Saturday 31 October 2026

10.30am–12.30pm

At Heruka Kadampa Meditation Centre, Golders Green

With Kadam Ai Peng McBretney

A BUDDHIST PERSPECTIVE

“If we cherish others, we will be happy all the time.”
— Geshe Kelsang Gyatso, Eight Steps to Happiness

It’s easy to be kind when others are kind to us. But when people are difficult — critical, unkind, or unfair — our instinct is often to withdraw, react, or protect ourselves.

In these moments, kindness can feel unnatural or even impossible.

This talk explores a deeper understanding of kindness — not as something dependent on others’ behaviour, but as a strength that comes from within.

From a Buddhist perspective, much of our difficulty in relationships comes from self-centredness — a strong focus on our own feelings, expectations, and point of view. When this dominates the mind, even small interactions can become sources of tension.

By gradually shifting our attention towards others, we begin to respond differently — with greater patience, understanding, and mental space.

Kindness then becomes a source of inner strength and stability, rather than something fragile or easily lost.

You will discover how to:

  • Stay kind without suppressing or denying your feelings
  • Transform difficult relationships into opportunities for growth
  • Develop inner strength grounded in compassion and wisdom

About the teacher

Kadam Ai Peng McBretney, meditation teacherKadam Ai Peng McBretney is the Resident Teacher of Duldzin Dragpa KBC and has trained in Kadampa Buddhism for many years under the guidance of Venerable Geshe Kelsang Gyatso Rinpoche. Drawing from her own experience of applying Buddha's advice in daily life, she shares the teachings in a warm, practical way that helps people see how to bring peace, happiness, and meaning into their everyday activities.

 

 

 

Schedule

  • Registration from 10am
  • Talk, meditation and questions: 10.30am–12.30pm
  • Refreshments: 12.30–1pm

Book now

£15.00

Free for Silver, Gold and Platinum members

Members of Heruka KMC can attend in person or join live via Zoom. Become a member.

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"When the turbulence of distracting thoughts subsides and our mind becomes still, a deep happiness and contentment naturally arises from within.” 

Geshe Kelsang Gyatso